Gratitude

We are running away from home for a few days.  The last time we tried this things didn't go as planned and we were home the next day, so we're hoping for a more successful experience this time around.

This morning's readings were reassuring and valuable but didn't point me in a clear direction for a post. I'm viewing that as a reason to just be thankful today for the blessings that are allowing us to look forward to a few days with family in a cooler climate.  Just a month or two ago I wouldn't have been able to do this so I am feeling very fortunate.

I am aware of a sense of peace and confidence that can only come from above. Perhaps that's why Psalm 32 hit the nail on the head today:

I talk to God:

"You are my hiding place; You will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance."-Psalm 32:7 (NIV)

He talks to me:

"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and keep My loving eye on you."-Psalm 32:8 (NIV)

What a lovely conversation.

On the health front:

I had my port flushed yesterday and was able to corral my nurse long enough for her to interpret Tuesday's blood draw results.  There was a slight improvement in my hemoglobin number and everything else is holding steady.  I was hoping for a little more exciting report but I guess I still need a bit more instruction in patience😊

Words of Wisdom

I had a mentor when I was a younger woman with kids still at home.  She didn't know she was my mentor but she would have been amazed at the number of women, and probably men as well, who took her words to heart.  Her name was Erma Bombeck and she died of cancer 'way too soon.

I recently came across some of the observations she recorded after she was diagnosed and they are worth sharing.  As you can guess, there's nothing here of a particularly spiritual nature but Erma's words bear contemplation.  

Here goes:

"I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending that the world would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day."

"I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose instead of letting it melt in storage."

"I would have talked less and listened more."

"I would have invited friends over for dinner even if the carpet was stained or the sofa faded."

"I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace."

"I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth."

"I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband."

"I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life."

"When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, 'Later... now go get washed up for dinner'.  There would have been a lot more 'I love you's and more 'I'm sorry's."

"But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it...live it... and never give it back."

Funny how a cancer diagnosis can make a person so wise.

On the health front:

I'll have my port flushed today and find out more about my blood draw results.  

Nothing else to report at the moment😊

Back into the vineyard

Wayne Jacobsen continues his beautiful parallels between my season of cancer and the seasons of the vineyard of his childhood this morning.  We're into the full force of summer in his father's vineyard and Mr. Jacobsen's observations resonate, with one difference.  The grapes in his vineyard are experiencing some mixed blessings as they feel the full force of their stress under the  unrelenting heat of the sun.  My situation differs slightly in that the intense heat of my summer is past.  My treatment is finished and I can look forward to a less stressful season. My intense heat is recent enough, however, that Jacobsen's words continue to give comfort.

The grapes need the sun in order to ripen but at the same time they experience stress under its intense rays.  The grapes' strength can be zapped and the quality of the fruit can be affected.  "This is summer in my father's vineyard, and it models one of the greatest paradoxes of our faith: Fruitfulness rises out of a hostile climate."-Wayne Jacobsen (In My Father's Vineyard).

Jacobsen rightly asks, "Who wants to dwell on suffering when we can talk about prosperity, blessing, and the abundant life?"  And I would have to answer, "I would!"  It truly has been the toughest of times in this journey that have caused my roots to go the deepest.  I would qualify my statement by saying that my intention is not to dwell on the suffering but I never want to forget it since it was a valuable companion for a long time.  I would even go so far as to invite my Great Physician to allow me to go through occasional discomforts as I continue on my way just to keep me aware of my continual need for Him. "We don't rejoice in trouble for trouble's sake, but we do realize that trials can purify our faith and increase our fruitfulness."-Wayne Jacobsen.

So, once again I am encouraged by this beautiful book, a gift from BFF Pat.  And now it's on to another good day!

"We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."-Romans 5:3,4 (NIV).

On the health front:

No news on blood test results so I will consider that good news.  I have an appointment to have my port flushed tomorrow so I'll get a copy of the results from my nurse and she will interpret them for me. Until then, "Ignorance is bliss."😄

Thanking Him....again

I'm back with Jeremiah Burroughs this morning.  His writings challenge me not only in the truths he highlights but in his writing style.  Since he lived in the 1600s his use of words is obviously going to differ from today's writing style, but that's part of the fun of reading his stuff.

Burroughs reminds me of another of God's mysteries; how He often brings His people into a low condition before He drops a great mercy on them.  I can testify to the truth of this.  I would never have known the degree of God's goodness today had I not been brought into a low condition. But how does this work?

"Usually when God intends the greatest mercy to any of His people He brings them into the lowest condition.  God seems to go quite across and work in a contrary way.......If it is a bodily mercy, an outward mercy, that He intends to bestow, He brings them physically low, and outwardly low.....Usually the people of God, before the greatest comforts, have the greatest afflictions and sorrows."-Jeremiah Burroughs (Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment).  And as examples he uses Joseph and David, two key figures of the Old Testament:

"When He intended to raise Joseph to be second in the kingdom, God cast him into a dungeon a little before."  And, "So when God intended to raise David and set him upon the throne, He made him to be hunted as a partridge in the mountains."

It appears that I'm in good company even if I'll never be "second in the kingdom" or "set upon the throne", but I have been brought physically low and I thank God often for this.  Life has become even more precious than before and I can attest to the goodness of God in every step of our journey through cancer.  I might have missed so many blessings had God not worked in His seemingly contrary way.

On the health front:

Blood draw this morning and I will be watching those numbers carefully as I inch my way back to good health😊

David's example

A fiction writer looking to write the ultimate novel that would contain sibling rivalry, combat, intrigue, fame, murder, treachery, moral excellence and moral failure would do well to base his main character on David of the Old Testament.  David lived it all and I always have the feeling that I am looking into his  heart and mind when I read the psalms that he penned.  This morning I'm returning to a couple of verses in Psalms 3 and 4 that express my gratitude so well.  I've posted on them in the past but here they are again.

David had a son named Absolom who was a favorite of his father as a younger man but who turned on David  later and caused him much sorrow.  When David wrote Psalm 3 his life was in great danger from the armies of Absolom, yet he (David) could write, "I lay down and slept, yet I woke up in safety, for The Lord was watching over me."  (Verse 5-NLT).  What confidence!

And again, in Psalm 4, David praises his God and says, "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for You alone, O Lord, will keep me safe."  (Verse 8-NLT).

If David, in the midst of his challenges, can claim these truths, how much more can I claim them in the midst of my challenges that pale in comparison to his.  

On the health front:

Today promises to be a good day😊

More perfectly timed encouragement

As I have mentioned before, the purpose of this blog has always been to give credit where credit is due in this journey through cancer. My purpose has never been to attempt to sway anyone to my belief system, nor has it been to infer that blessings cannot be recognized without the acceptance of my spiritual foundation, but the hardy souls who follow this blog have recognized that for me, my encouragement and guidance has come from God.
Inspiration does not come easily every morning since many of my reading sources are written specifically to the belief system of Christianity. While those readings strengthen my personal belief system, they do not specifically and obviously lend themselves to an application to these past ten months of my life.  This was the case this morning.  After reading three or four daily thought-provoking writings I was wondering why I couldn't find just the right one for this stage of my game.  And, as often happens, when I am ready to take the day off from posting, the last one is the prize.  It's fairly short and my personal directions from above are so concise in this paraphrase that I will share it in its entirety.

"Keep walking with Me along the path I have chosen for you.  Your desire to live close to Me is a delight to My heart.  I could instantly grant you the spiritual riches you desire, but that is not My way for you. Together we will forge a pathway up the high mountain.  The journey is arduous at times, and you are weak.  Someday you will dance light-footed on the high peaks; but for now, your walk is often plodding and heavy.  All I require of you is to take the next step, clinging to My hand for strength and direction.  Though the path is difficult and the scenery dull at the moment, there are sparkling surprises just around the bend.  Stay on the path I have selected for you.  It is truly the path of Life."-Sarah Young (Jesus Calling).
 

This encouragement is perfect for me today since I have been experiencing a few great days followed by a couple of not so great days and I find myself looking forward impatiently to some consistency.  This message is just what I needed.

"...though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with His hand."-Psalm 37:23-24 (NIV).

On the health front:
Pretty much summed up above.  July 30, the date for my PET scan, is just a couple of weeks away and I am ready!

Impatience

Sarah Young to the rescue again today.  As we get closer to the finish line I get more impatient and I need to be re-directed again and again.  I don't know exactly what I'm expecting but whatever it is, I want it now!  Mrs. Young's way of paraphrasing Jesus' words far surpasses mine so this morning's post will utilize quotes that spoke to me this morning regarding my impatience.  All of them are from Jesus Today.

"You seek relief and I make you wait.  Just remember:  There are many different ways to wait, and some are much better than others.  Beneficial waiting involves looking to Me continually-trusting and loving Me." (You'd think I would have learned this by now!)

"Thank Me for this time of neediness, when you must depend on Me more than usual.  Do not miss this opportunity by wishing it away."  (But it's so tempting to wish it away!)

"Don't let your past or present suffering contaminate your future.  I am the Lord of your future and I have good things in store for you." (Hold that thought, Barb!)

And I'll hold on firmly to the truth of the verse in Lamentations that promises, "The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him."- Lamentations 3:25 (NKJV).

And that's just what I needed this morning😊

On the health front:

It's a good day.

Peace

My day didn't start out particularly well for some reason....a bit of a surprise since I've had a couple of really good days.  I'm sure things will pick up as the day progresses but the up side of having a beginning such as this is that it helped me to relate well to Sarah Young's writing this morning.  Her subject is Peace.

Sarah reminds me that there are a couple of things to consider about the subject of peace.  First, I must recognize the need for it in my life and secondly, I must believe that it is attainable.  I have thoroughly learned through this cancer odyssey that I can't do all things at all times on my own and that life can get upside down in an amazingly short period of time.  I have asked for that elusive peace on more occasions than I can count and have found that it can, indeed, exist in the midst of chaos, as hard to believe as that seems.

"I made it clear that this [Peace] is a gift; something I provide freely and lovingly. So your responsibility is to receive this glorious gift, acknowledging to Me not only your need but also your desire.  Then wait expectantly in My presence, ready to receive My peace in full measure."-Sarah Young (Jesus Today).

There is so much truth in these few thoughts this morning and once again I'm in Sarah Young's debt for bringing them to the forefront at just the right time.

"Now may The Lord of peace Himself give you peace at all times and in every way....."-2 Thessalonians 3:16-(NIV).  

On the health front:

I got an encouraging report yesterday from the oncologist's office.  Although my white blood cell count and hemoglobin numbers are still below normal, things are moving in the right direction.  Now I think I will re-read my posts on Patience😄

Waiting and Trusting

This morning's inspiration comes from a truth that was brought to my attention through Streams in the Desert, a little book that is practically coming apart at its seams due to constant use.  I'm reading about the prophet Elijah and a situation in which he found himself back in 1 Kings in the Old Testament.

God had directed Elijah to a place where there was a productive stream that served not only the needs of the people but of birds and animals as well.  After a time that brook began to dry up and the birds and wildlife started leaving in search of a better source of water and eventually the stream dried up altogether.  Elijah was confident that he had been directed to that part of the country for a purpose so he waited for further instructions from God.  "Week after week, with unfaltering and steadfast spirit, Elijah watched that dwindling brook; often tempted to stagger through unbelief, but refusing to allow his circumstances to come between himself and God."-F.B. Meyer (Streams in the Desert).  And, as Elijah trusted would happen, God rewarded that patient spirit and guided him forward.

Meyer observed how many of us (and this applied to me more than once!) would have become anxious as our stream , whatever that stream represented, began to dry up and we would begin to devise our own plans for finding a new source of supply.  That truth has a familiar ring as I look back on the earlier period of our journey through cancer.  I wasted so much time running ahead of God until I realized that my plans for myself could never hold a candle to His plans for me. 

I'm not sure if I'll ever get it completely right but until I do I'll continue to follow Meyer's encouragement to "Wait, patiently wait!"-Psalm 27:14.

"Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His steadfast love endures forever."-1 Chronicles 16:34  (ESV).

On the health front:

It was a good day yesterday.  No news on Tuesday's blood draw results so I guess I'll be calling the oncologist's office today.

Thanks so much for your prayers😊

Praise and Thanksgiving

On a journey such as ours it's easy to get caught up in the moment, therefore missing the benefits of stepping back to take a look at the big picture.  The negatives seem to outweigh the positives at times and it's easy to miss blessings along the way.  For that reason I'm enjoying again the gems found in the book I received from a good friend titled The Tremendous Power of Prayer by Charlie "Tremendous" Jones and Bob Kelly.  This small volume is filled with Bible verses and observations from wise folks on many subjects but this morning I'm looking exclusively at the subjects of praise and thanksgiving. The Bible verses are from the New International Version.

"Be joyful always;...give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."-1 Thessalonians 5:16, 18.  At first it was easier to just practice the "in" part of this verse but now I also thank and praise Him for all circumstances as well.  Who would have thought that time would come!

"Too often we forget to thank God for answered prayer.  Praise is the proper punctuation mark for answered prayer."-Cadle Call.  I'm often guilty of this.  May I never take answered prayer for granted.

"The worship most acceptable to God comes from a thankful and cheerful heart."-Plutarch.  I so often catch myself asking in prayer rather than thanking in prayer. This just might be my focal thought for today.

"Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise; give thanks to Him and praise His name."-Psalm 100:4.  I never tire of this verse.

"It is always possible to be thankful for what is given rather than complain about what is not given. One or the other becomes a habit of life."-Elisabeth Elliot.  I've used this quote in a previous post but it's so good I couldn't resist doing it again.

And that's enough to chew on for one day.  

On the health front:

No (blood) news is good news?  One can always hope😊