Mysterious thing, this business of faith. Left on my own to describe what it is, I couldn't do better than the New Testament book of Hebrews where I read: "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."-Hebrews 11:1 (NIV). That's pretty hard to get our heads around, given that we live in a world of "Seeing is Believing". It's a whole new paradigm when we're asked to step off into what we can't see, but faith is just that.
Looking back on my own journey into faith, the scariest thing for me to contemplate was handing the reins of my life over to something or Someone I couldn't see or touch. But it was exactly that exchange that keeps me going today.
At times such as now, when the body fails and the spirit sags, I am so grateful that I am no longer depending upon what I can see, because what I see right now isn't all that great. But my faith, that mysterious thing that I can't see, keeps me going, knowing and trusting that although visible evidence might indicate otherwise, there is an invisible Power at work, forging and implementing just the right plan for me.
I wouldn't want to be taking this journey without faith.
BFF Pat opened my eyes to this beautiful prayer this morning, found in The Valley of Vision. In part it reads:
"Give me large abundance of the supply of the Spirit of Jesus,
That I might be prepared for every duty,
Love Thee in all Thy mercies,
Submit to Thee in every trial,
Trust Thee when walking in darkness,
Have peace in Thee amidst life's changes.
Lord, I believe, help Thou my unbelief and uncertainties."
On the health front:
It was not good news from the lab yesterday. My white blood cell count was lower than last week so I will require two Neupogen injections before my chemotherapy on Friday.
I'm tired. Really tired.
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