Resolve

Life is good, there are no new challenges to face, no responsibilities await that are troublesome, yet I seem to be stuck on a plateau where resolve is concerned. In all honesty, I am weary of this whole cancer thing and I seem to be at a mental crossroad of some kind.....one fork leading to victory, one leading to defeat. It's a good thing that I've been in training for this race for a while.
Anyone who has taken this journey knows the true meaning of weariness. It goes beyond tired. It sucks away at the spirit and can be devastating if coddled and embraced. Personally, I have chosen to acknowledge it, own it and push on through it. Wallowing in it is non-productive, at the very least.
I read Psalm 42 this morning and there I felt the deep distress of the psalmist as he fought the fear that God had deserted him as he ran from his very real enemy. He couldn't sleep, he wept constantly and cried out to the God that he had experienced so strongly in the past. "I will remember and weep. For once I was walking along with the great throng to the temple of God, shouting and giving thanks along with the crowd....".-Psalm 42:4 (NET).
Wow...I needed to read that! My enemy is indeed real but I feel a little foolish comparing myself to the psalmist of old since my drama has never reached the level of his. I will join him wholeheartedly, however, as he says, "Why are you depressed, O my soul? Why are you upset? Wait for God! I will again give thanks to my God for His saving intervention."-Psalm 42:5 (NET).
I really don't know how I could be doing this without my faith.

On the health front:
Boringly and blessedly the same.